Being on the brink of finishing
university feels like a rather precarious position to be in right now. I
feel a bit like I'm perched at the edge of a cliff, being slowly nudged
further forward as the days and weeks roll slowly over. Towards a drop
I can't see, I can't anticipate - towards something completely alien
and utterly alienating.
I don't want to be a
graduate because once I graduate, that's it. I'm out there, in the
world, without the comforting bubble and loosely cradling rhythm of
university terms, reading lists and student loans. I have to make
bigger decisions than what to have for breakfast, what club to go to on
the weekend or whether or not I should skip my lecture. Soon, I will
have to be a real adult with real responsibilities and God help me I
will even have to pay council tax.
I
feel like I should be excited. I feel like I should be taking things
in my stride by now, bowling through final term with renewed
almost-a-graduate gusto. I feel like I should have plans. But the
truth is, I'm fucking terrified.
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